I Don’t Know Who I Am: How to Understand Yourself Better

What is my purpose? Is this what I want? What about what I need? Who am I?

Do you ever find yourself pondering these questions or ones of the like? Many of us do and will throughout our lifetimes—it’s natural. We wonder about our purpose, what exactly we’re meant to do during our short time on this planet. And we yearn to keep digging deeper, to find what keeps our hearts happy and makes our souls complete.

There is no foolproof, quick guide to finding yourself or your purpose, but rather an adaptable way of living that will allow you to discover yourself and live your best life. Follow the following tips while on your journey to you and you’ll understand yourself better and better each day:

1) Do NOT limit yourself.

You should never limit yourself. In trying to understand who you are, you should explore all opportunities. This means experimenting: try out different hobbies, jobs, hairstyles; read a new book genre; go see that movie you weren’t sure you’d like; go on a date even if you’re so nervous you can’t remember your own name. The point is, how will you ever truly know what you like or who you are if you limit yourself to a small portion of the vastness that our world has to offer?

2) Get out of your comfort zone.

Comfortable is not always best case scenario. It’s important to push your limits to really discover who you are, even if you start out small. This could mean simply ordering something different from your normal only-cheese pizza—add some mushrooms on there. Or taking a different route to work—ride your bike on the back roads instead of taking the bus through the city. After tackling these more mundane tasks, push yourself even farther. Do something you were always scared of, like performing at open mic night or even jumping out of a plane. If you don’t, you just might wish you had or always wonder, what if?

3) Make yourself your #1 priority.

There are many different elements that make up one’s life: going to work, maintaining friendships, dating, paying the bills, visiting family, buying groceries, doing laundry, cleaning the house, and so on. There are so many, in fact, that we often forget about the most essential and most important one: ourselves. Make yourself the top priority and the rest will more easily fall into place. If you’re not properly taken care of then nothing else will be either. A focus should always be on maintaining your health and your happiness.

4) Commit yourself to what makes you happy.

Once you find what makes your heart sing, you are a giant step closer to discovering your true self. And you should devote yourself to whatever it may be, every single day. We could be talking about exercising, writing, cooking, doing research, inventing, helping others. You may even be able to make a career out if it, and you should if you can because the famous saying is right: “Find a job you enjoy doing, and you will never have to work a day in your life”.

5) Eliminate distractions and negative effects on your life.

To more quickly and easily discover your true self, it is helpful to eliminate distractions and negative effects on your life. These may be people, habits, or practices. Perhaps a controlling significant other or friend is holding you back. Or you’re spending an unhealthy amount of time scrolling through social media feeds. Whatever the source of the distraction or negativity, it’s best to rid your life of it or at least make a conscious effort to cut back on it. That way, you have more time and effort to put toward finding yourself and what is positive in your life.

6) Listen to your heart and your gut.

You know that feeling you get in your gut when something’s just not right? Or in contrast, when it feels like your heart is fluttering with excitement? Listen to these cues. They will ultimately help you decide between right and wrong and also guide you in making important life decisions. Following your gut and listening to your heart are two of the best ways to take the right roads on your journey to discovery of yourself.

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